"
ever have regrets? like that time that you gay-made-out with a coworker behind the dumpster at the local dive bar? and then brought them home for some assplay and then before you go for it you remember the crave case you got from white castle but it’s too late and you’re two knuckles in and then your brand new couch is ruined. and those cries of protest from you and your buddy wake up your daughter ‘cause it’s your weekend but you forgot because of all the alcohol and meth you do to dull the pain from the divorce? and now she’s gonna tell your ex wife and you’re gonna have limited visitations etc.
i know people like that. that’s why i make good life choices.
"
- me. telling my friend why i’m not investing in apple.
rusty tromboner
billiebatts: i really would like to try out a rusty trombone with you..don't tell anyone
fattie20xl: i'm gonna blog it.
billiebatts: motherfucka
billiebatts: i said it was between us
billiebatts: i just want to try it
fattie20xl: it
fattie20xl: is
fattie20xl: important!
billiebatts: i want my tongue in your hairy, stinky bunghole while i reach around and jerk you off
fattie20xl: i want that too! but i want to video tape it.
fattie20xl: and then comment mystery science theater 3000 style
billiebatts: fuck it
billiebatts: i just wanted a private moment with you
billiebatts: try to something out and now you have to make a whole event out of it
billiebatts: i wish i could quit you
fattie20xl: but... think of the ratings!
blumpkin
fattie20xl: yoooooooooo my penilebrotha!
billiebatts: yo
fattie20xl: i've seen more dicks than taryn thomas... while at work.
fattie20xl: this week
billiebatts: why
fattie20xl: truck drivers seem to love showing me thier dicks
billiebatts: is that weird?
fattie20xl: yeah
fattie20xl: it's weird.
fattie20xl: and creepy
billiebatts: i wish i could quit you
billiebatts: and your blumpkin buffets
fattie20xl: hahahahah at lowes?
billiebatts: mine is at lowes..yours i thought was at home depot
fattie20xl: no. mine's at an ace.
fattie20xl: i'm a little more discreet than you..
billiebatts: oh..old school
billiebatts: nice
billiebatts: ace is the place...for blumpkins!
fattie20xl: i support small private buisniess...h
fattie20xl: ahahahahah
billiebatts: we should really go and shit in display toilets
billiebatts: that would be the ultimate
fattie20xl: yo.... one night... we will!
billiebatts: bring a newspaper
fattie20xl: soon.
billiebatts: toilet paper
fattie20xl: okokok... here's my plan...
billiebatts: we'd either have a great story
billiebatts: get our asses kicked
billiebatts: or get arrested
billiebatts: ok..go
fattie20xl: i'm on the toilet, in home depot.... in a luchador mask... reading the sunday comix...
fattie20xl: you take a pic....
billiebatts: hsh
billiebatts: hah
billiebatts: ok..
billiebatts: thats funny
fattie20xl: and then you give me a blumpkin!
billiebatts: but are you going to really dump?
billiebatts: wait..
fattie20xl: probably not.
billiebatts: what if you get a dildo and it looks like im giving you a blumpkin
fattie20xl: chicken
billiebatts: well...im not gonna suck your dick..fag
fattie20xl: don't be a homo! you gotta. it's like... a promise!
